LaurenSpeaks

sometimes I think my life sucks.
then I do something stupid and realize the reason it sucks is because of me.

I just want him to be here to hold me on this lonely night. I want him to feel my hot tears through his shirt. I want to hear his heart beating when he pulls me close.

The lights are dimming in this cold room and I feel like everything is fading away.
You're so far from me now and I'm losing grip.

Your perfection breaks my heart. And hearing your laughter as you talk about her is the final nail in my coffin.

Babe, you kill me every time.

I wish I could get over you.

"I am the only one in the entire world who understands you", she cried. "How can you say you don't need me? I need you."
He looked at her. He watched the tears roll down her face and he thought she was the most beautiful thing in the entire world. He wanted to grab her and hold her close and kiss her until the world stopped. But He didn't. He walked away.
He could hear the sounds of her anguished sobs as he wandered off into nothingness. And he wanted to die from it. And the sound she made as she cried was the same sound his heart made as it broke.
El fin.

god im bored.
:(
-laur

I figured out how to use my MySpace so you guys should all be my friends now. :)

Mmkay?

-lauren

i thought we'd manage but words left unspoken...

fuck.this.

-lauren

My sister is going to be fourteen in two weeks.

fuck.

I hate this whole growing up thing. It's really starting to creep me out.

rawr.

<3, Lo-Ren

dearest winter break,

i love you with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. you move me to smiles and laughter. you replace the tears left behind by my wretched finals and demonic chemistry teacher. you change sorrow into joy. you are amazing and pure and represent all that is good in the world. without you, i would waste away into the abyss that is nothingness. in other words, you complete me.

sincerely yours,

your greatest admirer.

I am a hedonist.
Does this bother me? No.

What bothers me is not looking better than you, not living bigger than you and not enjoying myself.

Yes, I do realize there are starving children in other parts of the world, and naked babies dying from exposure, but these things are distant to me.

Right now, the only thing that matters is that I get what I want, when I want. and fuck you guys, because I want it now.

NOW.

Sincerely,
Lauren, the newest face of materialism.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JESUS!

and merry christmas to everyone else. <3

-lauren

p.s. fight club on dvd rules. so do labyrinth, rocky horror, edward scissorhands and series of unfortunate events.

kiss my ass, bitches.

hi guys.
i'm back.

it's 1:37 so im gunna go to sleep now but i'll see you tomorrow.
-lauren margaret

p.s. jason, you never called me back, which sucks for you because we were all dressed like hookers. majorly.

i am sitting here watching A Hard Day's Night. I am very tired.

My mom told me today I should get a boyfriend. Well, with more words. I don't think I have time for one. :/
or maybe I just don't want one. or both.

i am feeling so frustrated with everything right now. schools seems so pointless most days and I just dont feel like going any more. argh. i am just very unhappy with my state of being right now.

anyway.

lindsay is my sister. lindsay is cool. my sister is cool.
i'm gunna go read hpIV now.
and shower.

g'night moon.
g'night john, paul, george and ringo.
g'night, you.

-lauren

i woke up this morning and i was really sore.
being in a pseudo-coffin for three hours disagreed with me.
on the other hand, I have a hardcore bruise on my forehead.

my mom is making brunch and it smells so good and I am so hungry. I have to go to work in a couple of hours but I have to work on trig and chem shit first. boohoo. woe is me. my life is a mystery.

wait. my mom is driving up to the house. when did she leave? omg i am so confused.
hang on, let me ask her where she went. to osco. for toilet paper.
okay. random.

my head hurts. i'm gunna go get some aspirin.
see youse kids laters.
-laurizzle..

My day was going good until an asshole decided to yell at me because he's mad at something which really has nothing to do with me. But I talked to Hannah and she let me pick the music and I felt better. Then I came home and made a skirt and yelled at my sewing machine and didn't do my homework and felt even better.

So now I'm in a good mood again and I'm in love with the Plain White T's who are an emo band from Texas.
I want to go to homecoming with someone but I don't have a dress or a boy in mind.
ddaammnn.
oh well. I think I have to work anyway.

poo.
anyway, see you later.
peace out.
-l to the auren.

today was a rough day.






I miss my sister. :(

Dear Lauren,

Please stop being so hard on me. I do not appreciate it and it is starting to stress me out. Also, please try not to let the fact that everyone thinks you're an incapable flake get to you. Also, you keep forgetting to take your TUMS like the doctor recommended, which could lead to bone mass deficiency and eventually osteoporosis. Plus, brittle bones really are not in fashion right now. Furthermore, for your good health please to stop drinking so much soda, which also can deteriorate your bones. You like lemonade better anyway.

Love,
Lauren

p.s. Don't forget to fold your laundry.
p.p.s. You are cool.

i am sitting here and i am feeling very tired.
i dont much feel like moving from this spot, and if i wake up here tomorrow i will be sure to inform you of said fact.

anyway, life goes on as slowly and uneventfully as usual. i was feeling crafty these past couple days and made a shirt for the About to Crash concert, which will henceforth be called the A2C gig. because it's shorter and I'm tired.

I just talked to some girl on AIM who thought I was her friend but turns out I'm not. I kind of knew that all along because the only Danielle I know doesn't talk to me, but I felt bad to tell her she's an idiot.

I think I should get a new s/n and only give it out to the four people I actually talk to on aim. I am very tired and I'm kind of rambling.
my eyes are sore.

haha. i tried to type aim.com but it turned out maim.co...
jason says i'm a 8. I think with cleavage i could be an 8.7.
haha. I just got a new s/n. Now I have to figure out how to link them. okay done.

haha. I'm gunna go to sleep now. buhbye.

the new strokes song makes my heart race.

I want to marry Julian Casablancas when I grow up. <3 <3

did anyone else know that our school band is amazing?

well, now you do.

Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me

Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me
I wanna be dirty

 

 

(why is this movie so amazing and why does it make me so happy?)

i miss my college friends.

i miss last year. :(

ps anyone else dying to see mirrormask?